Romance
Is Rape By Seduction
By
Adam Shane Lawes
MY DIARY DIGITAL
DATA ENTRY 113 OF 145
Tonight I met up with my new friend Alice at the
church charity food van at the city's industrial market warehouse carpark - and
after we got our nightly meal to survive on from the church charity food van -
Alice brought all her belongings in garbage bags and a backpack back here to
the cemetery with me - And after I showed her my catacomb chamber room - then
as is always necessary for me - we then began to talk about our lives - And so
I told an obviously shocked Alice the basic story of my life including
obviously the real-life horrors that I have experienced and my own wrongful
behaviour from the past - and after that Alice was obviously showing signs of
being unsettled and uncomfortable in my presence - and so I promised Alice that
I would never harm her - And I am not sure if this made Alice feel anymore
comfortable - so I told her that she could sleep in the upstairs part of this
grave memorial while I slept sealed in my catacomb chamber room downstairs -
and she could also sleep with my hunting dagger knife which I keep with me
always here at the cemetery for my own personal protection - and also as soon
as we can we will find her own catacomb chamber room for her to sleep and live
in now that she is homeless - And then Alice told me her story including her
own sordid past - for Alice grew up in a broken home with a single parent and
her slightly younger brother - and where both her and her brother were not
abused but they were both ignored and not shown any attention or love growing
up from parental figures - and then Alice dropped out of school and moved out
of home at the age of sixteen years old in order to be an artist - and she
moved into the then bohemian inner-city suburb of Fitzroy and worked three
nights a week in a casual nightshift position in an independent bohemian cafe'
in Fitzroy whilst she worked on her artwork and tried to be successful with her
artwork - until the inner-city bohemian suburb of Fitzroy went through a
process of gentrification as the university institutions went through a massive
recruitment phase to make money - and so Fitzroy was overtaken by boring,
bourgeois university students and the bohemian crowd had to move out and the
bohemian cafe's - including the bohemian cafe' where Alice worked - had to
close down because of expensive rental prices as the gentrification of Fitzroy
took place for the expensive but boring, bourgeois, university student culture
- And then after that Alice's life fell apart - because first she had to go
onto unemployment benefits for three months and move out of her once beloved
inner-city suburb of Fitzroy and into cheaper residential accommodation - which
was in a cheap run-down rooming house in the red-light district of the
Melbourne inner-city suburb of St Kilda - and then after being on unemployment
benefits for three months - Alice was placed by one of the privatised job
search agencies that work for the government into one of the inner-city,
conservative corporate cafe chains in the central business district of
Melbourne where she had to wear an intentionally personality and individuality
denying uniform - and where no individuality or personality is allowed to be
shown in the workplace - and where she had to serve all customers with that
superficial, contrived, fake happiness that so many conservative corporations
wrongfully want people to behave like in the workplace - (and in every aspect
of people's lives if those conservative corporations also wrongfully had
complete control of the world) - And so Alice worked in the strict and
miserable environment of that conservative corporate cafe chain on the evening
shift performing customer service - and after a year in that job Alice had
begun to get ever increasing anxiety due to the rigid, personality and
individuality denying environment of that conservative, corporate cafe chain -
and also because of all the psychological abuse - (which is also obviously a
form of physical abuse) - from all the conservative, corporate customers that
she had to serve in her job - and so Alice's anxiety increased and manifested
in extreme nervousness and stomach pains and problems that got worse and worse
- until one evening when she had finished her shift and had gotten off the tram
at St Kilda and was walking back to her red-light district rundown rooming
house room - a pimp and drug dealer for some of the street prostitutes in the
red-light district region where she lived offered to sell her heroin - and
before this Alice had only ever done recreational party drugs back in her early
days of living in Fitzroy as the main drug Alice had used back then was the
drug ecstasy - which like many people she eventually stopped taking because the
come-downs after she used the drug ecstasy got worse and worse and gave her an
increased feeling of anxiety - and so it had been a couple of years since Alice
had used drugs and she had no desire to do so - and heroin was the last drug
that she thought she would try because of its reputation - and because she did
not want to increase her already high level of anxiety and she is afraid of
needles she told that street drug dealer no thanks to his offer of heroin - and
when he asked her why Alice told him the abovementioned reasons as he walked
down the street beside her - and so the street dealer told her that she did not
have to inject the heroin as she could smoke it and that it would also stop her
anxiety - especially her nervousness and stomach pains and problems - and then
the street dealer offered Alice a free heroin smoking hit - and looking at
Alice's conservative corporate cafe chain uniform - told Alice that it would
also block out all the nasty vibes of anyone who was causing her anxiety - and so
Alice said okay what the hell - and ducked into the start of a side street
alleyway with the dealer - and he put a small rock of heroin onto some aluminum
foil and lit it for her as Alice inhaled the heroin - and then that was it
Alice was hooked on heroin as it immediately took away all her anxiety and her
stomach problems and pains - and so Alice bought a small deal of heroin from
him and took it home with her - and then each evening before she went to work
Alice would smoke some of the heroin which stopped her anxiety and took away
all the anxiety connected physical nervousness and stomach pains and problems
that were from her horrible job - and which the heroin also blocked out the
nasty vibes of all the abusive conservative corporate bastards and bitches who
she had to serve in her customer service job in the conservative, corporate
cafe when those conservative corporate customers would continually abuse her as
she served them - and then each evening after work as she walked home in the
suburb of St Kilda - Alice would buy an increasingly larger deal of heroin from
the street pimp and dealer as her tolerance to the heroin naturally increased
and she required more and more of the drug to both get the same effects from
the heroin and also to stop the inevitable mental cravings and horrible
physical pain that happens during heroin addiction on a consistent daily basis
- and which also require a heroin addict to either keep using more heroin or go
through the necessary three days of very horrible mental cravings and extreme
physical pain to withdraw off the drug - and whether a person smokes or injects
the drug - the horrible withdrawal period is the same - and it is also
extremely difficult for anyone to get through that withdrawal period and off
their addiction to heroin if and when they want or have to do so - and so that
is how Alice unfortunately became addicted to the life-numbing and
life-destroying drug heroin - and it was not long before Alice's wages from her
conservative corporate cafe job could no longer support her living costs
combined with her heroin addiction - and so Alice then living in the red-light
district region of street prostitution in the inner-city suburb of St Kilda in
Melbourne - and being an attractive young blonde girl who was hooked badly on
heroin by that stage and whose drug dealer was also a street pimp for many of
the street prostitutes of that red-light district of street prostitution in St
Kilda - then in the midst of heroin addiction and with the constant knowledge
and personal experience that goes with the fear of that horrible feeling of
painful heroin withdrawal - Alice then also became a street prostitute - and so
after her evening shift in the conservative corporate cafe each evening where
she would go to her job in her counter sales position stoned on heroin to block
out all the abusive and horrible vibes of the conservative, corporate cafe
customers - after her shift finished there in the late evening - Alice would
then go back to the red-light district streets of St Kilda where she lived and
prostitute her body for money and bring back as many men as she could each
night to have sex with in her run-down rooming house room in order to support
her ever increasing heroin addiction - and this went on for five years until Alice
had finally had enough of her heroin habit and what it had done to her life -
because now Alice's tolerance to heroin was extremely high - and she had not
done any artwork since becoming a heroin addict - because in the small amount
of time that she was not working - she was too apathetic from being stoned on
smack to do any artwork - and so after five years of being a slave to smack and
sex to support her smack habit - Alice finally sought medical help to try get
through the difficult process of heroin withdrawal - and after many doctors and
many attempts - Alice was fortunate enough to finally find an extremely good
doctor who both knew how to get her through the painful process of heroin
withdrawal - and also pinpoint exactly why Alice initially became a heroin
addict in the first place - which like most heroin addicts is because of
anxiety - because heroin - despite the fact that it ruins your life and can
kill you and has killed a lot of people - heroin however also stops the
horrible overwhelming feelings of anxiety - and for anyone who has experienced
anxiety - especially on-going anxiety - they would know how anxiety can also
both limit and destroy your life - And so with the help of that good doctor and
strong painkillers and diazepam - the doctor helped Alice to finally quit her
heroin addiction - and so now Alice uses diazepam on a daily basis ever since
then to help treat her anxiety and to stop her falling back into heroin
addiction.
© Copyright
Adam Shane Lawes
