Romance
Is Rape By Seduction
By
Adam Shane Lawes
MY DIARY
DIGITAL DATA ENTRY 10 OF 145
This diary data entry is specifically about alcohol
- because alcohol is the drug that I fear the most because in my diary data
entry 8 I specifically explain in detail how I sculled from a bottle of rum
when I was age sixteen years old at a family New Years Eve party and then I
staggered over to the New Years Eve party bonfire and I publicly and violently
and forcefully and very lustfully tried to sexually rape my younger, beautiful,
pubescent, pretty, teenage, thirteen year old stepsister in front of my
blood-father, my blood-sister, my stepfamily and their friends at that New
Years Eve party – And as I previously stated in my diary data entry 9 I could
easily blame alcohol but those lustful bad desires were already in me to sexually
rape my stepsister – however that has scared me from drinking alcohol ever
since – and for some reason this has attracted a lot of abuse from people who
are under the influence of alcohol in my life including from a very young age
before I even drank alcohol – as one of the earliest memories I have of growing
up in the drunken environment of the caravan trailer park before my parents
divorced was as a young child and being with my father who was drunk and I was
sitting opposite him and on the lap of a male pedophile who I did not know and
who got me drunk and fed me chocolate and wrongfully fondled me until I vomited
– and then in the drunken parties above the takeaway food shop after my parents
divorced I remember adult couples sneaking into my bedroom when I was asleep
and waking me and with a funny tingling feeling in my stomach as they has sex
next to me – and after my blood-parents divorced, between the ages that I was
an 8 year old to 11 year old boy, one of my blood-father’s girlfriend’s when
she was drunk got me to suck on her breasts whilst also my father used to
spread her legs open so she was nakedly exposing herself and she was sexually
aroused and turned on when this happened – and then when my father married my
malicious abusive stepmother when I was 11 years old - my malicious, abusive
stepmother would become even more abusive under the influence of alcohol
including also her bad-mood alcohol hangovers – and then also doing horrible
physically heavy and hard and mentally mundane manual labour for so many years
I had to put up with some co-workers making it harder and even worse by being
either illegally drunk and abusive at work and/or having a bad mood alcohol
hangover and taking it out on me at work by being abusive including drunken
cruel ridicule and even having a box of tinned tuna painfully thrown at my head
by a ridiculing male I was ignoring and who was illegally under the influence
of alcohol at work – and also I was screamed at frighteningly from behind in a
public phone box by a drunk male who then bashed and repeatedly kicked me in
the head when I was on the ground and slammed my head into a brick wall - which
resulted in me having dangerous internal bleeding on the brain, a broken nose,
temporary loss of hearing, sharp stabbing painful piercing headaches, and a
permanently fractured skull which neurosurgeons later told me I was lucky to be
alive as that fracture in my skull had just missed a major artery in my head
which if it had of hit that major artery in my head I would have died
immediately there on the ground from massive blood loss, and I was also
unconscious and then in hospital - and in hospital whilst I was unconscious - I
had a horrible nightmare-like experience where I was falling slowly down into a
massive quarry like hole in the ground that was made of shiny dark bitumen like
rock - and my whole head was pounding and I could taste and smell the bitumen -
and it felt like the massive migraine headache that I had was pounding and
ingrained with particles of the bitumen - and as I descended down into this
rock quarry-like pit - All down the sides of the pit there were hollow alcoves
dug out that were filled with dead bodies that were not decaying dead bodies -
but instead somehow I knew without a doubt that all those bodies were of dead
people who were in some kind of coma-like sleep. And then as I fell deeper and
deeper into the rock quarry-like pit of shiny black rock - I suddenly saw the
frightening figure of a person who looked exactly like the classic hangman
executioner from history - and he had a sack over his head with only holes in
it for his eyes - and he was rapidly working and straining to carve out another
hollowed alcove down in the rock quarry pit were I was now suspended and
staring in fear next to him - And then as he turned and looked at me - I felt a
massive jolt of fear go through me from his stare back at me and his fearful
presence - And suddenly I was laying in my hospital bed in some kind of half
asleep and half awake nightmare-like state that I was trying to shake myself
out of from fear and back into being properly awake and then alive again -
because around me in my hospital bed, even though I was still
asleep/unconscious - there were all these people with bandages and wounds
looming over me - and I somehow instinctively knew that they were all dead and
had died in the hospital - and it was then that their eerie frightening
presence caused another massive jolt of fear to go through me and which woke me
up into being awake and fully conscious and alive again in the hospital
suffering those abovementioned severe head injuries. So as you can see alcohol
has caused me many problems in my life – and although it is legal it is
important for people who drink alcohol and judge people like me for being an
illegal drug user and a former illegal drug addict to remember that alcohol is
still a drug and although alcohol is a legal drug, in my country Australia,
alcohol kills more people each year here than all illegal drug deaths here all
combined together.
© Copyright
Adam Shane Lawes
